Asher's Story

***This story is a little long. I won't be offended if you jump to the pictures. I just wanted to record all this before I forgot all the details!***

As I was nearing the end of my pregnancy I made a big decision. I was going to try to have a natural birth at the hospital.  While I was in labor with Everett I had an epidural that ultimately worked great and led to us birthing a healthy (BIG) baby boy, but in the process of getting the epidural it was inserted wrong (it was literally a 1 in 10,000 person mistake).  I almost passed out after the bad epidural and the only thing I could think about while this mishap was happening was, "This was optional. I didn't have to get an epidural."   The chances of having another epidural mishap were slim with this second pregnancy but the whole ordeal really made me think about what I wanted this labor experience to be like.  I did my research.  I chatted with friends that had done a natural birth.  And I decided (with a bit of hesitation) that I could do it (or at least try to do it) without an epidural.  

My birthing plan was to try to stay home as long as possible so I could fight through the contractions in a comfortable atmosphere and not be too tempted to get the epidural.  Thursday (October 3) I had a regular doctor's check up.  My doctor had been concerned that baby brother was going to be quite large and was pushing for me to set an induction date, which I didn't want. Inductions can lead to more painful laboring and I wanted things to happen on God's time as much as possible.  So while my doctor was doing a pelvic exam she noted that I was already dilated 2cm and was 75% effaced and that my body was "favorable" for labor to happen soon.  She then "stripped my membranes" at the doctor's office, which meant that if my body was inclined to go into labor soon it would provide a 50-50 shot of jump starting the labor process.  About 30 minutes after leaving the doctors office I started to feel contractions coming on! 

When the contractions started we thought that we would be heading to the hospital that night so we called our sister-in-law, Jen, to come over and help me with Everett (Tom was actually at Parent Teacher Conferences when the contractions began) and she stayed the night at our house so we could leave at a moments notice to head to the hospital.  The contractions were coming at a regular frequency of about six minutes apart and my goal was to wait until I was about three minutes apart before heading in.  Contractions continued all throughout the night at that same pace so Tom and I just tried to sleep as much as we could off/on throughout the night. 

Morning came (Friday, October 4th) and we were kind of bummed things hadn't progressed anymore.  We took Everett over to Miss Patti's (daycare) and then Tom and I walked the neighborhood to try to speed things up.  Throughout the walk my contractions started coming around every three minutes and to get through the pain I walked like an "ajusshi" (Korean old man).  After being back from the walk we decided the contractions were frequent enough to head to the hospital.  As soon as we get to the hospital my contractions slowed way down! Bummer!!! They checked my cervix and I was still only 2 cm dilated.  I was so bummed because after a whole night of contractions there was no progress.  They had me walk the halls for 30 minutes and there was still no change, so I was sent home.  We were deflated. 

We decided to drown our disappointment with food.  We went out to eat and when my food came out I was so disappointed in it--it was not what I expected my order to be and I just lost it.  I started to ugly cry at the restaurant...over a below average turkey sandwich.  Obviously my hormones were crazy at that point. 

After more crying at the restaurant and in the car, we made it home.  After a few hours of resting at home and fighting through contractions, my contractions intensified in pain and in frequency.  I called my mom while in tears and asked her to come over to be with me and stay with E, which was great.  It brought me comfort to to see her and gave me a boost that I could make it through this crazy process. 

Shortly after she came, we decided it was time to give the hospital another try.  The hospital is about 30 minutes away and the contractions were coming a little over two minutes apart, so we decided we should head back in.  When we walked through the hospital doors we saw the same nurse that discharged me earlier and she said, "Oh you look much worse now." This was meant as a compliment, I think.  They quickly checked my cervix--4cm dilated! Again, with tears (do you see a crying pattern emerging?) in my eyes I asked the nurse to not send me home and she assured me I was there to stay. 

I labored for about an hour in a triage room before I was moved into a labor and delivery room.  As soon as I got to the room my doctor came to check me and proclaimed I was at 5-6cm's! I was making progress.  My water still had not broken at this point so my doctor decided to break it for me.  Instantly the contractions intensified. So. Much. Pain. No matter the position I could not get comfortable.  I thought to myself that if it was this intense for hours I didn't know if I could do it without an epidural.  I asked the nurse how long it would be before they would check my dilation and she said two hours or until I felt the need to have a bowel movement, which would indicate it was time to push.  A few minutes after that conversation I told the nurse, "I may be crazy but I think I may already feel like I need to push."  The nurse then checked me out and I saw her eyes light up as she said, "Oh wow! You are almost fully dilated! I would say you're 9 cm.  After about one more contraction you may be ready to push. I am going to go get the doctor."  I went from 6cm to fully dilated in 20 minutes!

At this point I realized that there was no turning back.  I was going to be having this baby naturally!!! We were going to do it!!! Minutes later I am grabbing the side of my bed while yelling across the room in pain, "I WANT TO PUSH!!!!"  Everyone responded with, "Not yet...you need to wait a bit." And I kept yelling, "I WANT TO PUSH!!!!!!!"  Finally the room was ready to go and I got the green light to push.  Everyone was so encouraging and I got to reach down and feel the baby's head after the initial pushes.  I had always heard that when the baby's head crowns it feels like a "ring of fire" and after a few pushes I started to feel a burning sensation so I yelled to everyone in the room, "RING OF FIRE!!!!!" (All this is pretty funny to me as I reflect on it now.)  After nine minutes of pushing our baby boy was born.  

They put him on my chest and we got to meet our little man. There are no words to describe these first moments together.  Hopefully these pictures will help explain what my words feel unable to say right now...

First moments together.

Although I didn't elaborate on it earlier, Tom did an INCREDIBLE job of staying by my side and coaching me through the labor process.  He rubbed my back and feet, read me encouraging verses, picked out music for me to listen to, advocated for me when I needed it, spoke truth into my teary/tired soul...He is such an amazing partner and I loved LOVED LOVED watching him become a dad again.   

First family picture! 

After a little time with our baby we decided on the name Asher James Meyer.  We are still deciding if we will call him Asher or AJ; right now it is a combination of the two.  Asher is from the Old Testament and was one of Jacob's sons (one of the 12 Tribes of Israel).  The name means happy and blessed.  James is big family name on both sides (both grandpas and an uncle on each side are James') so it was an easy choice to go with Asher.   Asher was 8 lbs. 11 oz when he was born (the same as me when I was born!) and 20.75 inches long.  He has long, dark hair and is nursing like a champ. 

We are SO IN LOVE!  Thanks be to God for a great little boy and smooth delivery.